5 Ways to Help a Grieving Friend

How to Support Someone Through the Stages of Grief

© Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen

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The stages of grief are well-known and accepted, and last approximately six months. Here are 5 practical ways to help a grieving friend through the mourning process.

When you have a grieving friend, you may want to help them – but you may not know how. Here’s how not to feel helpless when someone you love is mourning.

Coping with grief is an individual process, but there are stages of grief that most people go through. Part of helping a grieving friend is understanding that the stages of grief are a natural part of the mourning process.

The Stages of Grief

The stages of grief are disbelief, yearning, anger, depression and acceptance. These stages apply to a wide variety of losses, from a pet's death to divorce. Research shows that the stages of grief last approximately six months. The grieving process usually lightens after that amount of time.

5 Ways to Help a Grieving Friend

When you’re thinking about grief support, remember that your role is to be a friend (not a grief counselor or grief expert). You can’t solve every problem or make everything alright again. These ways to help a grieving friend will help you know what to do.

  1. Find practical ways to help. Help a grieving friend by bringing meals that freeze well and can be heated up in a few days or weeks. Offer to do laundry, grocery shopping, or errand running. If your friend has kids, volunteer to take them to sports practices or ballet lessons.
  2. Stay in touch. You may feel awkward and helpless when you have a grieving friend, but don’t let your own feelings of discomfort stop you from reaching out. Grief support – honoring your friend’s loss – is about calling on holidays or birthdays, or sending thoughtful cards.
  3. Locate resources. When your friend is coping with grief, he or she may not think to find grief support groups or grief counseling. Tactfully mention the bereavement counseling services nearby, or suggest grief support networks on the internet.
  4. Listen. Help a grieving friend by taking him or her out for coffee and offering to listen. Ask them to tell you all about the lost loved one. Coping with grief is more difficult when there’s nobody to talk to, so just listen.
  5. Watch for unhealthy reactions. Keep an eye on your friend for unhealthy responses to death, such as physical signs of depression, extreme weight loss, or social isolation. If your friend really seems to be struggling through the mourning process, talk to a grief expert or contact a grief support group. Find out what you can do to help your grieving friend.

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The copyright of the article 5 Ways to Help a Grieving Friend in Depression/Grief is owned by Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen. Permission to republish 5 Ways to Help a Grieving Friend must be granted by the author in writing.


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